Hey, good to see you. Today's article is going to cover how women truly feel about sex, because I do realize that a lot of men, have been curious for the longest time. They can't quite understand why the women they're with behave the way they do or approach sex the way they do.
Hopefully, this article is going to, you know, bring a couple of things to light and help you get into the mind of women, really. And so the next time you either demand it or expect it, you will think about some of the words that I share with you in this article today.
Many women find sex to be the deepest form of love and connection. However, the ways that women experience and express their sexuality is really, really different from how men do.
Now, get this. Most women need a reason to have sex, whereas men also need a reason. For them, a reason could be just seeing their woman naked.
For women, it's a little deeper than that. And if you begin to understand exactly how the female mind works, hopefully you'll have less issues. When it comes to matters that happen in the bedroom, most men's minds would readily say yes to sex, while a woman's mind most likely would say maybe.
All really depends on how her partner engages her prior to the act. And to be honest, in the absence of satisfying sex, a woman's sex drive can go into sleep mode. I can almost juxtapose it with the usage of an old computer, old fashioned computer, where if you don't touch the keys or move the mouse, it just goes into sleep mode and can remain in sleep mode for a very long time.
So here's one key thing to take note of. For women, sex begins in the mind. A lot of men tend to get very disappointed with women and ask questions like, why don't you want it? Why don't you crave it? For a woman, it doesn't really happen like that.
Our bodies are very different. Hormonally testosterone does cause physiological desire in both sexes, but to varied degrees proportionately, the male desire is a loud scream, whilst the woman's desire is more like a whisper. Now, when I say, for women, sex is in the mind, I actually mean it because for her, it's less about the act itself and more about the fantasizing, the reminiscing of previous good experiences, sexual experiences, that sort of gets her going.
And so, as a man, you need to really make sure that every sexual encounter is a good one if you're going to have your woman keep coming back for more. And if you're really observant it's as Clear as day. In times of falling in love and infatuation where she's constantly thinking about getting together with you, her sex drive is high. She seems more exciting and is willing to do a lot more to sort of cement that relationship.
Number two for women, sex is about being desired. While seeing an attractive guy could spike a little more excitement in women because obviously there are some women who are also very visual, there's a whole other spectrum of women who think more about whether he finds her attractive, hot or not.
Knowing that her man is hungry for her and can't wait to devour her, is waiting for the right moment is what actually gets her going. She wants to feel beautiful. She wants to feel loved.
She wants to feel desired. And that's why a lot of women will play so many games just to sort of elicit that response from guys like I want you. They'll run around the room and make you chase them.
They would do all sorts of funny things just to feel that feeling of desire. Just as, for instance, men tend to expect a lot more sex when it comes to marriage or being in committed relationships. Women sort of expect that feeling of being desired and being chased and they don't want that whole romance aspect of it to die.
And so if you're typically with a woman and you've been together for a long time, one of the biggest things she'll start complaining about is the fact that you are not romantic or you're not like how you used to be. You used to think about her in certain ways and deliver flowers or chocolates to her office without reason and all of a sudden you don't do that anymore. Women tend to want those things to continue because that, for them, is a true expression of love, of desire, of commitment.
And she will be willing to open up if you are able to really nail this particular pointer down. Number three for women, sex is a mixed bag. Now, one thing that men need to note is for a lot of women, the desire for sex can be derailed by a lot of things from chores at home that are incomplete or not done to kids that need attention to these little, little stresses that kind of happen or pop up in her daily routine.
If a woman begins to feel like you're not helpful, you're not supportive, and all you seem to want from her is sex, she's going to withdraw and you'll be left wandering and scratching your head, wondering where you went wrong. You may not be doing something wrong, but when you start to receive or get such a cold shoulder, you should start to really do some introspection to see if there are gaps in things that she needs right. If she doesn't feel like she's getting support from you, the last thing she wants to do is give you sex.
The main task for a lot of women is actually to try to turn off the psychological breaks that she pulls when it comes to sexual intimacy. Depending on where she grew up, for instance, there are religious thoughts and ideologies and ideas holding her back. Morals are holding her back.
There are so many things that women have been indoctrinated into to believe that you're supposed to hold back when it comes to sex. You're not supposed to be the one initiating, for instance. And so all these things come to play when it's almost time to go down.
Should I do it? Should I hold back? If you are married, there could be issues of, once again, even hormones. If she's approaching menopause, if it's that time of the month, women tend to be more sexually available around ovulation. It's just the way we are made.
And so you'd realize that just before that time of the month she will expect more love, expect more attention from you. And if she doesn't get that, she'll be resentful and it might affect your sexual intimacy in the bedroom. Now, women often come to bed wanting a great experience, right? But not really wanting sex unless they are aroused to do so.
And to be honest, sometimes getting to that point of arousal can be a whole chore, so to speak. Could take anything from ten to 45 minutes, depending on who she is. So it's more mental and psychological for women than just slam bang, thank you, ma'am, I'm out of here.
Experiencing regular orgasms is not as easy for women as it is for men. But obviously it's important for continued desire. If she keeps coming to you and she doesn't reach her orgasm or you're selfish and you just think about yourself and leave her high and dry all the time or every other time, she's going to begin to withdraw because the experience is never great.
So you'll realize that while men like variety when it comes to sex, for women it's more they like the tried and true positions that actually give her pleasure. I've heard men complain that my woman only likes missionary or only likes a certain position it's because that is what gives her pleasure. And sometimes if men understood this, they wouldn't be so hard on themselves or hard on the women that they're with about them, not giving them different positions that also excite them.
Not very easy for women to come by an orgasm. And indeed, there are a certain percentage of women in the world who will never attain an orgasm. And so if you don't really take into account her feelings and what works for her, you might end up in a relationship that lacks intimacy.
Number four for women, sex is contextual. She must feel emotionally safe to be able to give in. You can't treat her bad, treat her with disdain, treat her like she doesn't matter all week or all day, only to want to pounce on her when evening comes.
It won't work for you. And if she's not feeling like she's in an emotional space where you are satisfying her needs emotionally, the excuses will start to pop up a lot. And sometimes all the ups and downs in relationships tend to make women tame their desire and protect their heart instead.
Because men can just be intimate with a woman and not attach any feelings to it. Whereas with a woman it's a completely different story. Opening up the way she does is one of the most vulnerable ways she can let anybody into her life.
And so once she does that, it's almost like certain things are triggered and she just wants that emotional connection with you. She wants that exclusivity with you. She wants that relationship.
And that's why friends with benefits relationships never tend to go that way or end up the way they originally started. Because over time, as you get intimate with a woman, there are so many things that are going on beyond the surface that make her want to want you more, want you for herself and want some kind of meaningful relationship as opposed to just sex. For women, sex is an aspect of love.
It's not the only thing. Sex, talking, hanging out, working together, managing a home as a team, feeling appreciated, celebrating holidays, giving and receiving gifts all these things comprise love. For a woman, sex is part of the whole, it's not the entire thing.
And making love may flow from the warmth that she feels in a relationship, but it's not necessarily the source of heat. Number six, For women, sex is a way that they give love. So there are so many instances where you hear men complaining about the fact that they want their women to feel desire, right? They feel as if they're only the ones initiating.
If they never initiate, intimacy never happens. And they blame women for that. And then the women respond by saying, well, if you want it, I can give it to you.
I don't have to feel for it. But the fact that you do is good enough, so here you go. And it creates a lot of tension in relationships.
But what men need to understand is for women that act of still managing to give of themselves whether they were in the mood or not, is still an act of love. Don't forget because men are typically the initiators. They're always the ones who are in tune with their bodies.
When that happens, they know their body wants sex and so they initiate forgetting that the woman may not be on the same level as they are. So if she gets out of whatever mental space she finds herself in to come and please you or make you happy or engage you in intimacy, it's an act of love. And if you begin to see it that way, the complaints will begin to reduce and you'll understand where she's coming from.
She loves you is the reason why she gives it up, even when she may not necessarily feel for it. Finally, I'll just throw this out there. For women, sex also means great timing.
Problems with sex that people or couples blame on lack of desire can actually be mitigated if and only if the timing is right. For most men I've spoken to or encountered, and please, if you think otherwise, prove me wrong. Sex can be a reliever of stress for most women, on the other hand, sex can actually be a point of stress or a stressor.
And if you begin to take note of these things from both perspectives, you'll be more understanding and less intolerant about your partner's behavior. If she's not forthcoming or doesn't seem to be in the mood all the time when you are, sometimes it's not just about, hey, I feel for sex, so let's get to it. And then if she's not forthcoming, you complain.
Usually you need to really pay attention to what else has been happening in her day. Let's say you both even talk about the fact that tonight, when I get home, we're going to get intimate right after work, whatever, when the kids go to sleep. But you realize that during the day, let's say she had a bad day at work, or there was something that happened in her daily routine that didn't go well, that she's upset about, you need to be able to take that into consideration and maybe hold off initiating sex that evening.
And she'll thank you for it, because it will mean to her that you are more in tune with her, what she's going through, how she's feeling. And it's not just about satisfying your sexual urges. These are a few things that come to mind.
But top of mind, this is how women really think about sex. And if men could begin to really understand these things, I believe that relationships would be more exciting, more there'll be more understanding, and more relationships would flourish because partners actually understand where each other are coming from.